You may be wondering what I am doing on here posting this instead of celebrating “Love Day” myself? Or you may not be? Either way, I figured I would get on here since I am inclined to think a lot on the topics of love and marriage and (yes, sadly enough) even divorce lately—well, and my love-kins is making me a surprise dinner and has asked me to occupy myself alone until the unveiling :-D. So, here comes my ramblings:
Five years ago tonight my gentleman friend took me around to visit parents (his and mine) to let them in on our little secret (namely that we had every intention of tying our own proverbial knot) that we had been keeping for a couple of weeks (because neither of us wanted to be blushing when we said the word “fiancé” in front of strangers or not-so-much strangers ;-D). Most people who know us seem to think he popped the question on Valentine’s Day which is just cute to me. One way or the other, five years and two kids later, here I am, happier than I could have ever imagined and more in love than I ever thought I would know how to be. I just wish I could help everyone be as happy as we are.
I have been listening to music for a video I am making for my BIL’s upcoming wedding. Today I started reading “Covenant Hearts” by Bruce C. Hafen for a book club I belong to. Tonight I dropped my kids off to “hang out” with my parents (in other words “free babysitting *thanks Mom & Dad*). And, frankly, all of this has me thinking more and more about my own marriage and my thoughts on all of this stuff in general. So, to tie it all together (or not):
I am so grateful to my parents. I am happy to see two flawed humans who bungle around and struggle through their imperfections, but who have never EVER given up! That may sound like a backhanded compliment or something, but in my eyes it is anything but that. I shy away from false praise and phony, sugar coated description and I celebrate seeing the whole messy picture and appreciating the good in context. I think it is far more inspirational to know that a person has made the right choice and done good when they are just as human as I am (in other words, when it is a decision and not just a lucky coincidence). My parents give me hope for my own future and the future of my own marriage just by making theirs work through good times and bad. They help me know and see that love isn’t always just a feeling and it isn’t about what you get from another person (or spouse), but it is a decision and an action that you bring to it and do for the other person even when the going gets tough. How often I have heard people describe their desires for a couple to divorce. It has become so acceptable in our society that it just breaks my heart! I cannot abide it. Especially when covenants have been made in the house of God. I think if we could really understand just how much more is in store for us after enduring the hard stuff we would have a better understanding about why Satan gloats over those broken hearts and trampled covenants. I think if we could have the tiniest glimpse into heaven to see our Celestial Father and His plan and desire for us, we would walk through fire before entering into a covenant lightly or before breaking our covenants (no matter how good a reason we feel we have). I know I am long-winded, so I will simply say that tonight I learned more about enduring love by seeing my mother prepare a simple surprise for my dad of one of his favorite deserts than I could have learned by sitting through a thousand sermons on the subject. I want my children to catch me making my marriage work. I want to give them that hope and encouragement that some things CAN and DO last forever.
Today I am grateful for those who never give up on marriage. I am grateful for intact families and un-broken covenants. I am grateful because (as I am learning through reading this book) it is so important for society as a whole and for every child individually. Most of all, I am grateful to my wonderful husband, Marcio. I will never quit or give up. I promise. Eu te amo com todo meu coracao. Soh voce pode entender a minha alma. Obrigada por cinco anos bonitos e maravilhosos. Vamos ter sempre e sempre praticar esse “amor coisa.”
Ginger
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